What is the theory behind the worksheet?
This worksheet is based on the Satisfaction/Dissatisfaction paradigm, which explains how individuals form beliefs about a thing or event and those beliefs influence ulterior judgments (Aurier & Guintcheva, 2014).
How will the worksheet work?
The present worksheet will help practitioners assist their clients by familiarizing them with their unrealistic beliefs. By adjusting the expectations to the current reality, it is easier to interact with others and the world.
How to use the worksheet?
“Happiness equals reality divided by expectations” (Tom Magliozzi). Usually, there is a gap between what we expect from our future (or even present) and what the raw reality is.
To avoid disappointment and dissatisfaction people need to adjust their expectations to their current situation/ environment; think you could adjust the sails so you can navigate the waters in various conditions. You can either adapt to your reality or lower your expectations.
The following worksheet will help you decide the best strategy to improve your life and make changes. Fill in the exercises with brief sentences.
Reality versus expectations worksheet
Reality improvement
What relaxing methods can I use to help myself cope? E.g. meditation, Zazen, mindfulness, hypnosis, keeping a journal, etc.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What can I change in my life right now? How? When? With who?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Am I capable of reacting differently to certain situations (difficult ones)? How?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What kind of positive resources (confidence, courage, calm, etc.) do I need in my life right now?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Am I able to understand that sometimes I am not in control?
________________________________________________________________________
Sometimes you might have to “go with the flow”.
Lowering expectations
How do I imagine an ideal life?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
How do I expect others to treat me? Why?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Do I need to do my best all the time? Who says that?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
List some ways in which you can lower your expectation by one notch in the following areas: work, family, relationships, and finances. Give one example per subject.
References
Aurier, P., & Guintcheva, G. (2014). Using Affect–Expectations Theory to Explain the Direction of the Impacts of Experiential Emotions on Satisfaction. Psychology and Marketing, 31(10), 900-913.
You can download this worksheet here.